The War on Populism: The Final Act

So, it appears the War on Populism is building toward an exciting climax. All the proper pieces are in place for a Class-A GloboCap color revolution, and maybe even civil war. You got your unauthorized Putin-Nazi president, your imaginary apocalyptic pandemic, your violent identitarian civil unrest, your heavily-armed politically-polarized populace, your ominous rumblings from military quarters … you couldn’t really ask for much more.

OK, the plot is pretty obvious by now (as it is in all big-budget action spectacles, which is essentially what color revolutions are), but that won’t spoil our viewing experience. The fun isn’t in guessing what is going to happen. Everybody knows what’s going to happen. The fun is in watching Bruce, or Sigourney, or “the moderate rebels,” or the GloboCap “Resistance,” take down the monster, or the terrorists, or Hitler, and save the world, or democracy, or whatever.

The show-runners at GloboCap understand this, and they are sticking to the classic Act III formula (i.e., the one they teach in all those scriptwriting seminars, which, full disclosure, I teach a few of those). They’ve been running the War on Populism by the numbers since the very beginning. I’m going to break that down in just a moment, act by act, plot point by plot point, but, first, let’s quickly cover the basics.

The first thing every big Hollywood action picture (or GloboCap color revolution) needs is a solid logline to build the plot around. The logline shows us: (1) our protagonist, (2) what our protagonist is trying to do, and (3) our antagonist or antagonistic force.

For example, here’s one everyone will recognize:

“A computer hacker learns from mysterious rebels about the true nature of his reality and his role in the war against its controllers.”

In our case, the logline writes itself:

“After America is taken over by a Russian-backed Hitlerian dictator, the forces of democracy unite to depose the tyrant and save the free world.”

Donald Trump is our antagonist, of course. And what an antagonist he has been! As the deep-state spooks and the corporate media have been relentlessly repeating for the last four years, the man is both a Russian-backed traitor and literally the resurrection of Hitler! In terms of baddies, it doesn’t get any better.

It goes without saying that our protagonist is GloboCap (i.e., the global capitalist empire), or “democracy,” as it is known in the entertainment business.

Now, we’re in the middle of Act III already, and, as in every big-budget action movie, our protagonist suffered a series of mounting losses all throughout Act II, and the baddie was mostly driving the action. Now it’s time for the Final Push, but, before all the action gets underway, here’s a quick recap of those previous acts. Ready? All right, here we go …

Act I

(status quo/inciting incident)

There democracy (i.e., GloboCap) was, peacefully operating its de facto global capitalist empire like a normal global hegemon (i.e., destabilizing, restructuring, and privatizing everything it hadn’t already destabilized and privatized, and OK, occasionally murdering, torturing, and otherwise mercilessly oppressing people), when out of nowhere it was viciously attacked by Donald Trump and his Putin-Nazi “populists,” who stole the 2016 election from Clinton with those insidious Facebook ads. (For you writers, this was the Inciting Incident.)

(new situation/predicament/lock-in)

GloboCap did not take this well. The deep state and the corporate media started shrieking about a coming “Age of Darkness,” “The death of globalization at the hands of white supremacy,” “racial Orwellianism,” “Zionist anti-Semitism,” the “Bottomless Pit of Fascism,” and so on. Liberals festooned themselves with safety pins and went out looking for minorities to hide in their attics throughout the occupation. According to GloboCap, every “populist” that voted for Trump (or just refused to vote for Clinton) was a genocidal white supremacist undeserving of either empathy or mercy. Somewhere in there, the “Resistance” was born. (This is the plot point known as the Lock-In, where the protagonist commits to the struggle ahead.)

Act II (a)


As is traditional at the opening of Act II, things were looking promising for GloboCap. The “Resistance” staged those pink pussyhat protests, and the corporate media were pumping out Russia and Hitler propaganda like a Goebbelsian piano. Yes, there were obstacles, but the “Resistance” was growing. And then, in May of 2017, special counsel Robert Mueller was appointed, and “Russiagate” was officially launched. It appeared that Donald Trump’s days were numbered!

(rising action/first culmination)

But, no, it was never going to be that easy. (If it was, feature films would be less than an hour long, not to mention incredibly boring.) There was plenty of action (and an endless series of “bombshells”) throughout the ensuing two years, but by the end of March 2019, “Russiagate” had blown up in GloboCap’s face. “Populism” was still on the rise! It was time for GloboCap to get serious. (This was the classic first culmination, sometimes known as The Point of No Return.)

Act II (b)

(complications/subplots/higher stakes)

In the aftermath of the “Russiagate” fiasco, the GloboCap “Resistance” flailed around for a while. An assortment of ridiculous subplots unfolded … Obstructiongate, Ukrainegate, Pornstargate (and I’m probably forgetting some “gates”), white-supremacist non-terrorist terrorism, brain-devouring Russian-Cubano crickets, Russian spy whales, and other such nonsense. Meanwhile, the forces of “populism” were running amok all across the planet. The gilets jaunes were on the verge of taking down Macron in France, and gangs of neo-nationalist boneheads had launched a series of frontal assaults on Portlandia, GloboCap Anti-Fascist HQ, which Antifa was barely holding off.

(second culmination/major setback)

All wasn’t totally lost, however. GloboCap sprang back into action, successfully Hitlerizing Jeremy Corbyn, the leader of leftist “populism,” and thus preventing the mass exdodus of Jews from Great Britain. And the US elections were on the horizon. Trump was still Russian-agent Hitler, after all, so he wasn’t going to be too hard to beat. All that GloboCap had to do was put forth a viable Democratic candidate, then let the corporate media do their thing. OK, first, they had to do Bernie Sanders (because he was another “populist” figurehead, and the point of the entire War on Populism has been to crush the “populist” resistance to global capitalism from both the Left and the Right), but the DNC made short work of that.

So, everything was looking hunky-dory until — and you screenwriters saw this coming, didn’t you? — the pivotal plot-point at the end of Act II, The Major Setback, or The Dark Night of the Soul, when all seems lost for our protagonist.

Yes, implausible as it probably still seems, the Democratic Party nominated Joe Biden, a clearly cognitively-compromised person who literally sucked his wife’s fingers on camera and who can’t get through a two-minute speech without totally losing his train of thought and babbling non-sequiturial gibberish. Exactly why they did this will be debated forever, but, obviously, Biden was not GloboCap’s first choice. The man is as inspiring as a head of lettuce. (There is an actual campaign group called “Settle for Biden!”) GloboCap was now staring down the barrel of certain swing-voter death. And as if things weren’t already dire enough, the “populists” rolled out a catchy new slogan … “TRUMP 2020, BECAUSE FUCK YOU AGAIN!”


So, all right, this is part where Neo orders up “guns … lots of guns.” Which is exactly what our friends at GloboCap did. The time for playing grab-ass was over. Faced with four more years of Trump and this “populist” rebellion against global capitalism and its increasingly insufferable woke ideology, the entire global capitalist machine went full-totalitarian all at once. Suddenly, a rather undeadly virus (as far as deadly pestilences go) became the excuse for GloboCap to lock down most of humanity for months, destroy the economy, unleash the goon squads, terrorize everyone with hysterical propaganda, and otherwise remake society into a global totalitarian police state.

And that wasn’t all … no, far from it. GloboCap was just getting started. Having terrorized the masses into a state of anus-puckering paranoia over an imaginary apocalyptic plague and forced everyone to perform a variety of humiliating ideological-compliance rituals, they unleashed the identitarian civil unrest. Because what would a color revolution be without rioting, looting, wanton destruction, clouds of tear gas, robocops, and GloboCap-sponsored “moderate rebels” and “pro-regime forces” shooting each other down in the streets on television? (In an homage to Orwell’s Ministry of Truth, the corporate media, with totally straight faces, have been describing this rioting as “mostly peaceful.”)


That brings us up to speed, I think. The rest of Act III should be pretty exciting, despite the fact that the outcome is certain. One way or another, Trump is history. Or do you seriously believe that GloboCap is going to allow him to serve another four years? Not that Trump is an actual threat to them. As I have said repeatedly over the past four years, Donald Trump is not a populist. Donald Trump is a narcissistic ass clown who is playing president to feed his ego. He is not a threat to global capitalism, but the people who elected him president are. In order to teach these people a lesson, GloboCap needs to make an example of Trump. Odds are, it’s not going to be pretty.

See, they have him between a rock and a hard place. As CNN’s Fareed Zakaria explains, on election night, Trump will appear to have won (because the Democrats will all be mailing in their votes due to the apocalyptic plague), but later, once the mail-in votes are all counted, which may take weeks or even months, it will turn out that Biden really won. But, by then, it won’t matter who really won, because one of two scenarios will have already played out.

In Scenario Number One, Trump declares victory before the mail-in votes have been tallied and is “removed from office” for “attempting a coup.” In Scenario Number Two, he doesn’t declare victory, and the country enters a state of limbo, which the Democrats will prolong as long as possible. Either way, rioting breaks out. Serious rioting … not “peaceful” rioting. Rioting that makes the “BLM protests” we have witnessed so far look like a game of touch football.

And this is where the US military (or the military-industrial complex) comes in. I’ll leave you with just a few of the many ominous headlines that GloboCap has been generating:

“This Election Has Become Dangerous for the U.S. Military” — Foreign Policy

“Al Gore suggests military will remove Trump from office if he won’t concede on election night” — Fox News

“Former ambassador warns of election violence” — The Guardian

“All Enemies, Foreign and Domestic”: An Open Letter to Gen. Milley (“If the commander in chief attempts to ignore the election’s results, you will face a choice.)” — Defense One

“Is Trump Planning a Coup d’État?” — The Nation

“Trump could refuse to concede” — Washington Post

“What happens if Trump loses but refuses to concede?” — Financial Times

“White Supremacists, Domestic Terrorists Pose Biggest Threat Of ‘Lethal Violence’ This Election, DHS Assessment Finds” — Forbes

“Trump’s Attacks Put Military In Presidential Campaign Minefield”NPR

“Trump’s Election Delay Threat Is a Coup in the Making” — Common Dreams

“What If Trump Won’t Leave?” — The Intercept

“How to Plan a Coup” — Bill Moyers on Democracy

“It can happen here: A Trump election coup?” — Wall Street International Magazine

“Whose America Is It?” — The New York Times

Does it sound like GloboCap is bluffing? Because it doesn’t sound like that to me. I could be totally wrong, of course, and just letting my imagination run away with itself, but if I were back home in the USA, instead of here in Berlin, I wouldn’t bet on it.

In any event, whatever is coming, whether this is the end of the War on Populism or just the beginning of a new, more dramatic phase of it, the next two months are going to be exciting. So, go grab your popcorn, or your AR-15, and your mask, or full-body anti-virus bubble suit (which you might want to have retrofitted with Kevlar), and sit back and enjoy the show!


CJ Hopkins
September 20, 2020
Photo: Independence Day, 20th Century Studios, et al.

DISCLAIMER: The preceding essay is entirely the work of our in-house satirist and self-appointed political pundit, CJ Hopkins, and does not reflect the views and opinions of the Consent Factory, Inc., its staff, or any of its agents, subsidiaries, or assigns. If, for whatever inexplicable reason, you appreciate Mr. Hopkins’ work and would like to support it, please go to his Patreon page (where you can contribute as little $1 per month), or send your contribution to his PayPal account, so that maybe he’ll stop coming around our offices trying to hit our staff up for money. Alternatively, you could purchase his satirical dystopian novel, Zone 23, or Volume I of his Consent Factory Essays, or any of his subversive stage plays, which won some awards in Great Britain and Australia. If you do not appreciate Mr. Hopkins’ work and would like to write him an abusive email, feel free to contact him directly.

73 thoughts on “The War on Populism: The Final Act

  1. “anus-puckering paranoia”. HA! That’s brilliant. You’re back in brutal/funny form. not that the last posts haven’t been funny, but, let’s face it, they’ll be a whole lot funnier 100 years from now if anyone survives and retains the human capacity to laugh. Or cry. But this one did have me laughing.

    All I can say for now is I’M SO BORED WITH THE USA! (The Clash had it right, over 40 years ago)


  2. Sorry I can’t see the “war on populism” CJ.

    Nor am I a subscriber to the “democracy” we don’t have one .

    I feel as though people were (and are) lost in fear brain’s nervous system freeze response but when a threat is not gone, it turns to anger( fight response ).

    Especially with media inciting violence and discord.

    We all create our world from our thoughts and feelings which are then manifested in our actions so people need to realize they are being mind controlled and manipulated by the media.

    What are you choosing to bring into the world fear or love?


  3. Nobody gives a crap about these sociopaths messed up world anymore. If they want to bicker and fight then we can throw all of them in a UFC ring and let them get at it. I have better crap to do then fight all these tarded haters.

    The worst live to have in the world is a white man in the USA. What a joke.


  4. “Donald Trump is a narcissistic ass clown who is playing president to feed his ego”
    Mind-reading on your part. So unless you are some kind of certified mind reader, abstain from this and concentrate on actions and results.


  5. CJ, you forgot some choice lesser-known but no-less-hilarious Gates: TwoScoopsGate, KoiGate, and MLKBustGate. And thank you for pointing out the fact that Trump is apparently both a Russian Agent raised from a young age by Putin to subvert the United States government from within and a Nazi; far too many people miss these sorts of details. :)

    Schöne Grüße from a fellow Ami in NRW.


  6. Comrades!

    The capitalist system of global repression enters its terminal crisis. The fascist parasites driven mad by greed now destroy the engine they feed off of. Observe the rulers as they destroy their economy, ruin productivity, cast millions into unemployment, threaten the safety and security of the workers. With their crazed ‘lockdowns’ the fascist rulers directly assault the liberties of the masses. In the name of monopoly medicine, the corrupt hospital racket and Big Pharma.

    Now, seize this historic opportunity militants of humanity! Organize. Intervene. Strike. Rally your ranks for the final fight. Socialism or Barbarism!!

    Leon Trotsky

    Returning from the People’s Soviet Republic of Nibiru.


  7. Speaking of gates, I’m just praying for Gatesgate…

    Here’s how it happens: Gatesgate 2: The Golden Throne

    Old Bill Gates arrives from the future, aided by an invincible cybernetic life support exoskeleton, his mission, is to kill his earlier self before young(er) Bill Gates can unleash a faulty vaccine which kills almost everyone on the planet in 2030.*

    (*Almost everyone except for Donald Trump, his children, a handful of call girls and the entire membership of hair stylist convention.* (*who get lost on the way to the convention hotel and remain unvaccinated.) The survivers set about re-populating the world.)

    Tooled up like Sarah Connor in one of the sequels, Wild Bill Terminator accidentally arrives in his TimeWindowsᵀᴹ machine at the wrong time and place, smashing into the side of the Whitehouse where the operating system crashes and must be rebooted. Only then does Wild Bill realise he left the rescue disc back in 2037.

    He convinces Donald Trump to invite Bill Gates (the younger) to the white house under a ruse and get him plastered enough so that he can be subdued, reasoned with, or forced to abandon his plan for global domination of the vaccine market. Unfortunately, Donald, young Bill and older Bill fall to reminiscing. Before you know it, they’re up to their eyeballs in coke and call girls, and generally partying like it was 2020. An oblivious Whitehouse staffer mails video footage to Vice and the rest should have been history.

    But right at the end a Gates2000 Terminator arrives to kill older Bill *and* younger Bill (and Trump if possible.) After the disaster remains un-averted back in 2037 and news of Gatesgate has appeared in the new timeline, a next generation Terminator is sent back from the future. The Gates2000 (Mimetic poly alloy, with an aversion to cocaine) should in theory have been invulnerable, but – (continues on interminably…)


  8. Satire…. And here I thought that Samuel Clemens had worn it all out, and used up all the remains.
    President Trump would not have agreed to even run for President..
    If the group that approached and asked him to, didn’t have clear, damn near infallible plans… with contingencies, to show him.
    They, the white hats, have only been organized and planning since shortly after the death of JFK. In his first term in office, President Trump, and his white hats, have gotten THE ENTIRE WORLD… to submit. Don’t believe me? I can’t blame you, it’s certainly not on the news here in America…. go back and look at all the pictures and videos that he has taken with world “ leaders “
    They’re all standing behind him, with their hands clasped together… in a subtle sign of submission… to let others… know, that they had no choice but to deal with him.
    How did he do this?
    He took the evidence to them, laid it all out in front of them…
    And said something like:
    “ you’ve been a very bad boy.: or girl…and you’re gonna get punished regardless!
    But, if you work with, and for me,
    I’ll give you the only choice…
    For a chance.., at life in prison, and a protected legacy and family.
    If you won’t work a deal for me..
    Execution and shame!
    The fed.
    The house of Saud.
    The Queen.
    The royal family.
    The Vatican.
    North Korea.
    The billionaires and their mistresses.
    And even… I suspect… the damn dirty Democrats…
    After all… Who in their right mind would pick Biden and Harris to run against President Trump?
    No one!
    It wouldn’t surprise me…
    If President Trump himself…
    Picked them.
    Of course that… if true… is one little bit of info that will never be made known to the public.
    Mainstream media here in America… hasn’t reported any of this…. nor have they reported any of the rescued children, or mass arrests and shutdowns of human traffickers.
    And, if I were a betting man….
    I’d bet that after the new year, we will see a lot of interesting information, and confession videos, released to the public, as well as a whole new, and improved… President Trump.
    You know.. to quote the Kenyan Skidmark.. more flexibly after the election….
    But hey, what do I know?
    I’m just an old oilfield welder… a country boy… and certainly not anywhere near… a published satirist.
    Keep your feet in the stirrups,
    And your heart and your mind open.
    By the way…. how are you enjoying buying gasoline by the liter there in Germany?
    Is it cheaper than beer?
    Had any good Mexican food lately?
    I’m pretty sure you’ve had some excellent sausage…
    So have I.
    The eyes of Texas are upon you.


  9. […] According to the script, this is the part where Trump refuses to respect “democracy” and has to be forcibly dragged out of office by the Secret Service or the military, ideally live on international television. It may not end up playing out that way (Trump is probably not as dumb as I think), but that’s the Act III scenario for GloboCap: the “attempted Trump coup,” then the “perp walk.” They need the public and future generations to perceive him as an “illegitimate president,” a “usurper,” an “intruder,” an “imposter,” an “invader” … which, he is. (Being rich and famous does not make you a member of the GloboCap Power Club.) […]


  10. […] According to the script, this is the part where Trump refuses to respect “democracy” and has to be forcibly dragged out of office by the Secret Service or elements of the military, ideally “live” on international television. It may not end up playing out that way (Trump is probably not as dumb as I think), but that’s the Act III scenario for GloboCap: the “attempted Trump coup,” then the “perp walk.” They need the public and future generations to perceive him as an “illegitimate president,” a “usurper,” an “intruder,” an “imposter,” an “invader” … which, he is. (Being rich and famous does not make you a member of the GloboCap Power Club.) […]


  11. […] Según el guión, esta es la parte en la que Trump se niega a respetar la “democracia” y tiene que ser arrastrado a la fuerza fuera de su cargo por el Servicio Secreto o elementos del ejército, idealmente “en vivo” en las televisiónes internacionales. Puede que no termine siendo así (Trump probablemente no sea tan tonto como creo), pero ese es el escenario del Acto III de GloboCap: el “intento de golpe de Trump”, luego, la “marcha del delincuente”. Necesitan que el público y las generaciones futuras lo perciban como un “presidente ilegítimo”, un “usurpador”, un “intruso”, un “impostor”, un “invasor”… lo cual es. (Ser rico y famoso no le convierte en miembro del GloboCap Power Club). […]


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