The Two Minutes Hate (New Normal Edition)

Today’s edition of the Two Minutes Hate, brought to you by GloboCap, Inc., and featuring an all-star line-up of GloboCap Goldsteins, will begin shortly. Please take your seat and switch off your remaining critical faculties. We’ve got a butt-load of hate in store for you today. First, though, a few important announcements.

First, due to the increased number of Goldsteins threatening the very fabric of democracy, and GloboCap, Inc., and its global partners, and their assorted subsidiaries, agents, and assigns, the Two Minutes Hate has been extended beyond its traditional two-minute running time and will henceforth be presented more or less around the clock until further notice.

Also, in a departure from the original Two Minutes Hate in Orwell’s 1984, we’re going to skip the opening “this is our land” part, which is (a) dated and (b) unacceptably unrepresentative of the racial, ethnic, and gender diversity of the New Normal Reich …

… and get right down to the “shrieking hatred at the images of Goldstein” part.

Please be advised that the following content contains material designed to whip the masses into a mindless frenzy of hatred, which some audiences may find distressing. Other audiences might find it amusing. After all, there’s no accounting for taste. Regardless of which audience you feel you are a member of, viewer discretion is not advised. In fact, exposure to the following content is pretty much mandatory, and is physically inescapable, unless you live “off-grid” in the woods somewhere, which you don’t, or you wouldn’t be reading this.

OK, that’s it for the pre-show announcements. Time for the hate! Ready? Here we go.

New Normal Goldstein Number One

Goldstein Number One is obviously Trump, who is both a Russian asset and literally Hitler. The fact that Trump is literally Hitler was conclusively established in 2017 by Ron Rosenbaum, who apparently wrote a book about Hitler, and is a “world expert on the Nazi leader,” according to The Independent.

But, even back in 2016, before the Russians “hacked the election” and stole the presidency from Hillary Clinton by “weaponizing African American voters” with anti-masturbation memes on Facebook, everybody already knew he was Hitler

Plus, Jason Stanley (the Jacob Urowsky Professor of Philosophy at Yale University!) and The New York Times proved it in this 2018 video! And the BBC found a random “German guy” who said it, so what more proof do you need? Even his former lawyer now confirms it!

But it isn’t just that Trump is literally Hitler, he’s also a literal Russian asset, as Jonathan Chait reported in New York Magazine in February of 2021! Of course, by that time, everybody already knew that he was a Russian operative, and a treasonous traitor, and Putin’s homosexual lover, as The New York Times revealed in this charming little animated film!

And all that was before he ordered his underground white-supremacist Putin-Nazi forces to try to overthrow the US government by frontally assaulting the Capitol Building with two or three hundred unarmed bozos and assorted federal agents in MAGA hats!

As Michael Fanone, a former DC cop who was brutally assaulted during the rioting, and who is currently a “law enforcement analyst” and an on-air contributor at CNN, put it when the latest indictment of Trump was announced …

“I felt proud to be an American, much of the way I did when when I learned that our military had killed Osama bin Laden. Osama bin Laden was a terrorist who committed a horrific act against American people and against our Republic. I believe Donald Trump is a terrorist who committed horrific acts against the American people.”

So, shout it out … TRUMP! TRAITOR! TERRORIST! PUTIN’S COCK HOLSTER! OSAMA BIN HITLER!

New Normal Goldstein Number Two

Goldstein Number Two is RFK, Jr., the infamous anti-vax conspiracy theorist, who is also Hitler, or is aligned with Trump, who is literally Hitler, and Osama bin Laden, and a Russian asset! Yes, that’s right, in addition to all his conspiracy-theorizing and anti-vaxxing, Bobby, Jr. has been tweeting secret “Nazi dog whistles,” presumably at the behest of Trump, who is presumably taking direct orders from Putin!

Also, according to The New Republic, not only is Bobby an anti-Semitic, Putin-loving, woman-hating transphobe, but he more or less drove his ex-wife to kill herself! On top of which, he is going around saying that the CIA assassinated JFK! Their sources are reporting that he is back on the heroin, and has joined some sort of GOP-funded Satanic neo-Nazi death cult!

That, or else he’s actually a covert “conspiracy-mongering Republican plant” or “a useful idiot for MAGA demagogues,” or some other type of science-denying, democracy-hating, Nazi traitor, which is Walter Shapiro’s current theory, also published by The New Republic, which is giving The Guardian a real run for its money as the go-to mouthpiece of the Ministry of Truth.

So, shout it out … RFK! ANTI-VAXXER! TRAITOR! TERRORIST! CONSPIRACY THEORIST! HITLER!

Assorted Other New Normal Goldsteins

OK, you’re probably wondering why Putin isn’t Goldstein, being the Ultimate Source of All Evil, as he is, and the Hitler of All Hitlers, and the Antichrist, and so on. Well, there’s actually a very simple explanation.

See, the thing is, Goldsteins have to be traitors. It’s essential to their Goldsteinness. Putin, evil though he definitely is, is not a traitor, not “a cancer, an evil tumor, growing, spreading in our midst” (see original Two Minutes Hate).

The Two Minutes Hate is designed to condition the masses to unleash their hatred against the traitors, the Judases, the dissidents, the apostates, the deniers of Reality, the deniers of Truth, the science deniers, the Covid deniers, the climate-change deniers, the deniers of … whatever. The “racists.” The “transphobes.” The “anti-Semites.” “Anti-vaxxers.” “Conspiracy theorists.” “Far-right extremists.” “Insurrectionists.” “Terrorists.”

There’s no shortage of Goldsteins in The New Normal Reich. There never is in any totalitarian system … not even one that masquerades as “democracy.” The essence of all totalitarianism is conformity, and mindless hatred of non-conformity, and demonization of any form of dissent, and, ultimately, the criminalization of dissent. It’s the Goldsteins here at home that need to be dealt with! The disinformationists! The malinformationists! The “free-speech” subversives who want to debate us!

New Normals don’t debate or argue with Goldsteins. They shun them. They “cancel” them. They censor them. They report them. They delegitimize them. They vaporize them. They vent all their pent-up hatred at them … their crippling self-hatred, and their shame, and their rage.

Because the other thing The Two Minutes Hate is designed to do is direct that rage and hatred at an appropriate official scapegoat. Totalitarians need to blow off steam. Mindlessly following senseless orders and robotically parroting official propaganda that you know is a bunch of lies is no fun. Repressing the rage and shame that produces, after a while, can make you want to … gosh, I don’t know, take some folks out in the woods somewhere and shoot them in the back of the head, or lock them up in a camp, or something. It’s better to get all that out of your system in a structured, emotionally-supportive setting, or on a DHS-moderated social-media platform, or the balcony of your Central Park South apartment, as Keith Olbermann did back in 2021.

So go ahead, shout it out one more time! Fill in the names of all the Goldsteins in your life … or, you know, formerly in your life. The traitors! The deniers! The anti-vaxxers! The Russia-loving far-right extremists! The racists! The transphobes! The anti-Semites! You’ll feel so much better once you have … or at least you’ll feel a little relief that will get you through until the next Two Minutes Hate!

All right, that’s it for today’s Two Minutes Hate. I hope it wasn’t too emotionally distressing. Oh, yeah, and if you’re a member of one of those “other audiences” I referred to above … well, I told you I thought you might find it amusing. I would probably keep that to myself, though, if I were you. You never know when The New Normal Reich is going to go full-blown totalitarian again!

###

CJ Hopkins
August 4, 2023


DISCLAIMER: The preceding essay is entirely the work of our in-house satirist and self-appointed political pundit, CJ Hopkins, and does not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the Consent Factory, Inc., or its staff, or any of its agents, subsidiaries, or assigns. If, for whatever inexplicable reason, you appreciate Mr. Hopkins’ work and would like to support it, please go to his Substack page, or his Patreon page, or send a contribution to his PayPal account, so that maybe he’ll stop coming around our offices trying to hit our employees up for money. Alternatively, you could purchase his satirical dystopian sci-fi novel, Zone 23, or Volumes I, II, and III of his Consent Factory Essays, or any of his subversive stage plays, which won some awards in Great Britain and Australia. If you do not appreciate Mr. Hopkins’ work and would like to write him an abusive email, feel free to contact him directly.

9 thoughts on “The Two Minutes Hate (New Normal Edition)

  1. All your Hitlers are belong to us.
    There will be no redistribution.
    We are hoarding them from the shirkers who stand in the way of the workers utopia with their wrongthink and facecrime.

    Like

  2. The correct reponse to the Two Minutes Hate method of control is to stay completely calm and practise breathing exercises or whatever technique works for you. Then, from a calm state, watch how other people are behaving around you. If you see anyone else staying calm like you, make eye contact. Perhaps speak to them and discuss what is going on. Not on social media of course. That’s getting dangerous. And at some point talking to other calm people or even staying calm during the Two Minutes Hate might get you dragged out and shot in the back of the head, but it’s just possible that it won’t because this era might end in a mass revolt against the new normal. I doubt it, but it might. Obviously I feel there is still hope or I wouldn’t be bothering with any of this, I’d be doing something productive or enjoyable or generally life enhancing.

    Like

  3. CJ you have no idea how reassuring it is to know that there is someone out there who came up through the academic and arts “system” and for some reason, can still see reality in full 3D high-def accuracy. You are my best discovery of the last three years, intellectually speaking.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, but, and I’m sorry to disappoint, but I didn’t come up through the system, unless you count studying film at university a million years ago. I’ve been an outlaw artist all my life. I just sort of sneaked into the system for a while.

      Liked by 3 people

  4. Newsflash

    Experts believe Airstrip One, Oceania’s most grovelling outpost now qualifies as a full blown culture war idiocracy like America.

    Months of media seeding have given rise to the proliferation of ‘right, far right, fascist, racist, Trump loving, science denying’ insults.

    The BBC’s flagship presenter was caught grooming a 17 year old boy. Quickly followed by accusations against a mini Himmler right wing presenter. All hell was set loose on the streets of Twitter as the liberals invented mad conspiracies against the far right media (including the BBC) who didn’t report the story to their satisfaction.

    It emerged from an assumed deep state source called ‘Byline Times’. Lawyers are calling their Bermuda estate agents as I write this. The probable real reason for the reluctance to publish a hastily collated story.

    Like

  5. My mother dragged me off to Billy Graham extravaganzas when I was little. She’d go into a trance; I’d crawl under the bleachers. Groupthink has always terrified me. “Let’s” might be my least favorite word.
    Great piece here, CJ Hopkins!

    Like

  6. The sixth and ninth of August 1945, can never be forgotten, these are the dates of unforgivable US war crimes.

    Regardless of so-called UN human rights narratives, and all the democracy and the rule of law propaganda and lies, those fateful two days prove that civilization has still not happened to humanity.

    When two atomic bombs were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, two cities in Japan, for absolutely no military reason at all.

    Over two hundred thousand people in both cities were instantly vaporized.

    And these people were not war criminals, they were not soldiers, these were not in any way concerned with the war.

    They were civilians, children, women, old people, unborn children.

    What was their crime?

    For what were they being punished?

    American was trying to prove itself the greatest power in the world!

    All the US generals who were involved in the war were surprised that the atomic bombs had been used, because it was only a question of just fifteen days more and the war would have ended, that was the longest period estimated.

    So it had nothing to do with the war.

    The Japanese were already defeated and ready to surrender.

    The reason was purely psychological, political.

    “Postwar Russia might be more manageable if impressed by American military might, and that a demonstration of the bomb might impress Russia.” – US Secretary of State, Byrnes – 1945

    We should take the responsibility to see that nuclear events like Hiroshima and Nagasaki never happen again.

    All politicians should be forced, “Either to stop all efforts for war immediately, or be legally removed from office and their comfortable seats of power.

    We will find other presidents, other prime ministers with intelligence.”

    We have to use the memory of these unforgivable US war crimes, as a day of declaration against all of the insane, warmongering politicians of today, who in their complete unconscious stupidity are leading humanity and all life on earth to total annihilation!

    And still the globalist vested interests cannot allow this earth to become awake.

    Before it can wake up, they are ready with all their nuclear weapons to destroy it.

    It is such a calamity.

    Man has not evolved as far as consciousness is concerned.

    Thousands of years have passed, man’s stupidity remains the same.

    We have to evolve our intelligence, our awareness, our consciousness.

    What is intelligence?

    Intelligence is the capacity to be in the present.

    The more you are in the past or are in the future, the less intelligent you are.

    Intelligence is the capacity to be here-now, to be fully aware in this moment and nowhere else.

    Then you are awake.

    You still don’t know yet who you are.

    You have not looked into your own reality.

    You are not awake.

    A mind full of thoughts is not awake, cannot be awake.

    The work of intelligence – non thinking – is to help you to become aware of your being.

    To be intelligent needs effort, to be intelligent means you have to grow up, to become mature.

    To drop all of your identification with the political, the religious and all of your laughable woke masks.

    Growth is painful.

    To be intelligent means you have to be continuously alert and aware; you cannot fall asleep, you cannot live life as a somnambulist.

    To be intelligent is very difficult because you have to move away from the herd mentality and stupid crowds.

    These people have been the greatest criminals.

    They have divided humanity.

    If you have any intelligence, think of yourself only as a simple human being.

    And when your intelligence grows a little more you will drop even the adjective “human”; you will think of yourself only as a being.

    Always Be Aware that to live amongst blind people with eyes is a very dangerous situation, if you are discovered they are bound to destroy your eyes.

    They cannot tolerate you, you are an offense.

    Stupid people can only be destructive, because true creativity is possible only when your intelligence is awakened.

    Just watch as stupid people are preparing for more and more destruction.

    Marxism is the latest such new religion.

    Intelligence is freedom from any ideology.

    Can’t you simply live without any ideology?

    Is an ideology needed?

    Why is an ideology needed so much?

    It is needed because it helps you to remain stupid, it is needed because it helps you to remain unintelligent.

    It is needed because it supplies you ready made answers and you need not find them on your own.

    Once you start believing in all the propaganda and lies, your intelligence stops growing.

    Global boiling, global eugenics and psy-op pandemics, NATO proxy wars, Aliens are amongst us!

    It is certainly very dangerous to have unintelligent people in powerful posts.

    And it is becoming more and more dangerous, because they have more and more power and less and less intelligence.

    But why does it happen?

    There is a subtle logic in it.

    People don’t want to change.

    Change is arduous, change is difficult.

    Wake up!

    It is not impossible.

    Seek, find and start to use your own intelligence.

    Intelligence is not of the mind, intelligence is one of the qualities of your being.

    But remember, mind is being used as a vehicle for it, hence the confusion.

    People think intelligence is of the mind, it comes through the mind.

    Mind is the instrument for its expression.

    Mind itself is only a bio-computer.

    It has a memory system just as any computer has, you feed the memory system and the mind keeps the memory.

    But memory is not intelligence.

    Know yourself.

    Be yourself!

    PS… A.I. can not be intelligence, as it can never become conscious, become alive.

    Consciousness is life itself.

    Liked by 2 people

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