The column you are about to read is a “hate crime.” Or, rather, an alleged “hate crime,” as I believe my attorney would like me to put it. We’re still sorting that distinction out in criminal court. Or, rather, we are about to sort it out again, on September 30, in Berlin Superior Court. We… Read More The Hate-Crime Commissar of New Normal Berlin

OK, this will be one of my non-satirical essays … or mostly non-satirical essays. It will serve as a companion piece to The New Normal Left, another non-satirical essay that I published in April 2023, which was basically just a reiteration of a speech I gave at a conference in London. It went over pretty… Read More The New Normal Right

Thank God for the 10/7 Truthers! For a moment there I was starting to worry that the world was never going to learn The Truth about how the Israelis murdered everyone on October 7th and blamed it on Hamas. Yes, that’s right, you evil Zionist genociders, SUCK ON THE TRUTH! The IDF did it. They… Read More The 10/7 Truthers

Well, what do you know, it looks like we’ve got another “CRISIS OF DEMOCRACY” on our hands. Yes, that’s right, folks, THE VERY FABRIC OF DEMOCRACY IS AT STAKE … again! Which means (surprise!) that it’s probably time to declare another STATE OF EMERGENCY and take some sort of EMERGENCY MEASURES to protect humanity from… Read More That’s All Folks (Redux)

So, my show trial for thoughtcrimes in criminal court in New Normal Germany went pretty well. I was acquitted. Technically, it isn’t all over, because the prosecutor has a week to appeal the decision, but, given the circumstances, I doubt he will. He made a total fool of himself in front of a large audience… Read More The Verdict

I told you this part wasn’t going to be pretty. I didn’t think it would get to the point where the Wall Street Journal would go full Buck Turgidson and call on the United States to “show it can win a nuclear war,” but I wasn’t entirely off the mark either. Back in January (i.e.,… Read More The Rise of the New Normal Reich

So, it’s three weeks before the US midterm elections, and it looks like we have got ourselves a horse race! That’s right, folks, once again, it’s time to start playing with those forecast maps on Real Clear Politics and FiveThirtyEight, and obsessively following the fluctuating poll numbers of congressional candidates you have never heard of… Read More Please Remember Not to Vote!

Dear Consent Factory: I’m a fairly new associate at a global media relations firm. One of our firm’s clients, a private non-profit university located in a developing country and primarily funded by the U.S. Department of State, has got a bit of a situation that we were hoping you could help us make go away.… Read More Ask the Consent Factory (Episode 1): So Our Client’s New Chairman Murdered A Few People